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FEATURED COLUMNS

the late shaft
talk shows battle like it's 1993
by joe procopio (@jproco)
topic: television
2.1.10 • CLASSIC

When people approach me in the local supermarket or at the Jazz Dance studio and ask me how I got to be so damn funny, I usually have three answers: 1. Screwball Teen Comedies 2. Gatorade 3. David Letterman Then I chastise my entourage for letting the general public wander into the Joe Zone. Beyond the obvious implications of the rule-of-threes and non-sequiturs in that list, my answer has a lot to do with upbringing. I was exposed to funny at an impressionable age. I was a little kid during

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let's make a deal?
paying a price for not paying the price
by jael mchenry (@JaelMcHenry)
topic: general
10.5.11 • CLASSIC

How many deals do we see a day, and how many do we need?

I opened one of my less-used email accounts the other day and was just floored. Somewhere along the way I got on the lists for buckets of these Groupon-type providers, and apparently they've been accruing for ages -- restaurant deals, shopping deals, drink deals, deals for classes and lessons and events and supplies. Bloomspot and Facebook deals and Swirl and some kind of random Amazon-in-your-face thing, and they just keep coming and coming.

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listen, i'm not joking. this is my job!
dammit, jim, i'm an editor, not a monkey
by adam kraemer (@DryWryBred)
topic: writing
12.5.08 • CLASSIC

For those of you who don't know, I started a new job a couple of months ago. (cue cheers, applause, streamers, live animal sacrifices) After a brief sojourn into the exciting world of copying and pasting, I am once again a copy editor, this time correcting style and grammar for a pharmaceutical advertising agency. This means that I've started to return to the "notice every typo all the time" mindset. Which, last time around, really annoyed my friends when they sent me e-mails. Or it might jus

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required summer reading
solving the joys of the detective novel
by michelle von euw
topic: writing
8.10.09 • CLASSIC

Summer has always been the best time for reading. Perhaps because I've spent almost my entire life on a semester schedule, the months of May through August have been the ones in which books I read for pleasure take a top priority over the ones that I have to read. Asking me what genre of books I prefer is pretty much like asking me what type of fiction I write: both questions are met with an uncomfortable silence, some verbal hedging, and then usually the words "literary, but not too literar

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taking the under
10 of the most underrated flicks since 1990
by mike julianelle
topic: film
10.6.08 • CLASSIC

A recent article proclaimed Outside Providence one of the ten most underrated movies of the past 15 years. I don't think so. It's an enjoyable flick with a weak lead performance, some nice supporting turns and some funny moments. For the purposes of this column, let's define an underrated movie as "a great movie that is not recognized as being great." Outside Providence doesn't quite fit. So what does? Glad you asked! I made a list. First, some qualifications: I eliminated movies that got a

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2009 things…
…on my list
by tracey l. kelley (@TraceyLKelley)
topic: humor
12.29.08 • CLASSIC

I plan on saving at least $2,009 in every quarter next year, by the grace of my employment and the economy. I hope to reduce my dropping of the f-bomb by 2,009 utterances. Not that I say it 2,009 times now. However, there’s a slight possibility I do. I will remove 2,009 pieces of clutter from my home. Let’s start with the stacks of magazines: 1) to be read; b) read, but with pages flagged; 3a) picked up on some trip fully intending to be read but gathering dust under my desk. I want to compl

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jason in the middle
making meaning of middle age, mortality and milestones
by jason gilmore (@JasonGilmore77)
topic: general
6.16.11 • CLASSIC

The problem with being middle aged is that no one ever, not even once, takes five minutes out of their life and pictures themselves being middle aged beforehand. Youth is wasted on the young, the famous saying goes, and during my youth, I was too self-absorbed to picture myself as being anything more than young, senile or dead. I could conceive of death (I’m from inner-city Toledo, death surrounded me) and I knew I would grow old someday (I was a church kid, old people surrounded me), but for so

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cleaning a dirty mouth
quitting cursing cold turkey
by jeffrey d. walker
topic: humor
10.10.11 • CLASSIC

This article is about foul language and is not appropriate for children.

For as long as I’ve been old enough to use curse words, I have. Living in New York City from 2002-2005 did little to curb this behavior. I also had one work situation that featured cursing on an often and loud basis. Overall, since my mid-twenties especially, I’ve had little need, desire, nor encouragement to curb my foul-mouthed behavior.

Fact: I have been known to shout offensive words in public places just to cause a rise, because I think it’s funny, and especially after a few drinks. Fact: Cursing earned me a awesome rear corner office at my law firm, because people in the waiting room could overhear my cursing from my original smaller office. True story. The word mentioned was fuck, by the way. Just think about that when you want your corner office.

And now, after thirty-six years, I am changing my behavior. Kind-of, sort of.

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don't take your caveman shopping
leave the hunter at home
by maigen thomas (@Maigen)
topic: humor
5.23.11 • CLASSIC

Men and women are different. If you didn't figure that out playing "Doctor" in the first grade, then hopefully you have established some kind of understanding in the years since. Beyond the physical differences that make dating, mating and relating so damn interesting are the psychological and genetic characteristics that drive us nuts when dealing with the opposite sex. We love them, but we hate them. One of the most obvious is shopping. Women love to shop, in general. Some feminists or

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do i have to have faith?
according to bill maher, it's religulous
by alex b (@Lexistential)
topic: film
10.13.08 • CLASSIC

Faith is a tricky thing. No rational thought is involved, and I'm obliged to suspend my logical abilities while unconditionally accepting anything without tangible proof. As a Catholic, that basically means anything. I'm expected to believe in virgin births, four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, and that people fluent in gibberish are actually speaking in tongues. Hmm. O-kay. Thus, like any doubting Thomas or anyone inclined to question their religious origins, I checked out Religulous. The movie

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they can do it! and so can you.
6 tips for successful blogging
by sarah ficke (@DameMystery)
topic: writing
8.24.09 • CLASSIC

Have you read a blog today? I don't know you (unless I do. Hi!), but I'm going to guess that you have. If fact, you might have read several. Even with the up-and-coming competition of Twitter, blogs are holding strong. The best ones are supplying readers with the news and views they used to get from newspapers or the television, and even the worst are catering to someone out there with a passion for... armadillos in socks, say, who doesn't care if said blogger knows a preposition from a peanut.

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twitter fiction
using a first-person tool for a third-person perspective
by erik lars myers (@TopFermented)
topic: writing
11.21.08 • CLASSIC

Sometimes, useful tools exist where you least expect them to. As I've been working through the process of exploring the amazing world of Web 2.0 applications, I've come to see utility in places that I would not have previously expected. The social tool that I find myself becoming increasingly impressed and attached to is Twitter. Twitter can be referred to as a micro-blog. As a Twitter user, you have 140 characters to relay your thoughts of the moment to the world. 140 characters is a lot

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who moved my chi?
finding my way back to inner peace
by heather m. millen
topic: general
4.23.08 • CLASSIC

I'm an incredibly organized person. I keep an "Infamous To Do List" that is updated daily and nothing gives me greater pleasure than checking off items. I like clean surfaces and carefully arranged closets. Clothes belong in a chest of drawers, not the floor of my bedroom. I have boxes and drawers and baskets, all to better organize my life... and my husband's life if he would only listen to me and STOP LEAVING ALL THAT CRAP ON THE DESK! When something is lost in the house, it's inevitably

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future tenz
the sexier decade ahead
by jeff miller (@jmillerboston)
topic: pop culture
1.6.10 • CLASSIC

In The Tenz, we fly in hovercars fueled by laughter and rock n' roll. We've adopted a single global language, which is a hybrid of all known languages with a sprinkle of jazz theory. Consequently we're all getting along much better, and everybody can dance. Moral and religious disputes have gone the way of Disco, praise Gawd. World peace sets the stage for tolerance, innovation, and a new cultural renaissance. Creativity and intelligence are valued over celebrity and convenience. Our elected le

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RECENT COMMENTS

re: irrussistible
I am not going to read it this time. I do and I just cannot pull myself together to comment. It is a beautiful tribute. I am very glad that you wro...

re: guns don't kill people....
Can we please find a way to heal and protect? I NEWTOWN, Conn. (AP) — A man opened fire Friday inside two classrooms at the Connecticut elementary sc...

re: a year without netflix
I would expect that and especially Netflix. Marketing, baby. They're spending zillions to get new subscribers....

re: everybody poops
What a bunch of crap! :-D Sorry. I tried to let it pass. Butt I'm weak. [edited]...

re: you are on your own heroes journey
Too short. Sigh. Thanks Maigen. I just miss him. I am glad that I can find people who cared deeply for him here. He had such good friends here!...





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