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riaa 2 you 0
it's all vanilla ice's fault
by joe procopio (@jproco)
topic: music
7.1.09 • CLASSIC

Yes, I am going to rail on this again. Yes, there are more important, globally-impacting events going on in our world. Yes, Iran is the new Iraq, the economy is in the tank, and even so, Michael Jackson probably should have been the topic of this column. Or Billy Mays. But dammit, we still find ourselves mired in a bizarro universe in which record companies are hell bent on suing their customers as a primary marketing strategy (the secondary strategy being placing hit singles in Burger King c

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pursuing the perfect bite
playing with your food, playing well with others
by jael mchenry (@JaelMcHenry)
topic: general
3.5.07 • CLASSIC

We've been talking about Kobe beef for years, but the truth is, up til now, what you could get in the States wasn't Kobe. It's all been "Kobe." It's been "American Kobe" or "Kobe-Style Wagyu", and you couldn't put the real thing in your mouth in America. But now, the ban's been lifted, and Kobe is here. You can taste it. And how much will you pay for the privilege? Around here, about $25 an ounce. No, not per steak. Per ounce of a steak. Naturally, there's a 5-ounce minimum. Bringing your cost

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neo-con...dem nation!
caught between barack and a hard place
by adam kraemer (@DryWryBred)
topic: news
11.10.08 • CLASSIC

November 6, 2008 I can honestly say I have never been as proud to be a citizen of the United States of America as I am this week. I did not expect the outcome of this election to effect me so viscerally, but I freely admit that I have found myself choked up more often in the last two days than pretty much the entire rest of my life. It's been like watching the end of "Field of Dreams" over and over and over again. When he calls the young John Kinsella "Dad" and asks if he wants to have a catch

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it's peyton's world
the colts just live in it
by michelle von euw
topic: sports
2.7.07 • CLASSIC

A new era has begun. Welcome to the Mannification of the world as we know it. Football fans were sick of Peyton Manning before last Sunday; now that the golden boy’s got a big fat ring to go with all the other accolades that have been heaped upon his pale shoulders, be prepared for our future. All Peyton, all the time. A few years ago, there was a quote that made sports fans chuckle whenever it was repeated. “I won at every level, except college and the pros.” The reason it was so funny wa

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making some short lists
check this twice!
by mike julianelle
topic: humor
12.13.06 • CLASSIC

Isn't it strange that around Christmas time - Jesus' Birthday! - more focus seems to be put on Santa Claus and his naughty/nice list than on Jesus and his heaven/hell list? Held hostage and forced to watch a landslide of holiday-themed dreck this December, the overlap between Jesus and Santa Claus has never been more apparent to me, and it's kind of strange. All that we need for Santa to take over as Supreme God of All Creation is for Mel Gibson to film a scathing, first-person, brutally realis

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i see you, but it doesn't matter anymore
the rise and fall of music videos
by tracey l. kelley (@TraceyLKelley)
topic: music
6.27.12 • CLASSIC

Recently on a Saturday morning, I spent a couple of rare hours doing nothing but watching music videos on satellite television. As a child influenced by the 1980's MTV juggernaut, this is the adult equivalent to zoning out over cartoons.

I slipped into a programming cycle that let me see highlights from:

*80 and 90s pop/rock: ("Keep it Dark"–Genesis; "Never Tear Us Apart"–INXS; "Dear God"–XTC; "Smells Like Teen Spirit"–Nirvana)

*current country: ("Good Girl"–Carrie Underwood; "Banjo"–Rascal Flatts; "Pontoon"–Little Big Town")

*and current pop/R&B: ("The One That Got Away"–Katy Perry; "That Girl Right There"–Usher; "Titanium"-David Guetta featuring Sia)

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a letter to amina pearl gilmore
talking to my daughter while she can't talk back
by jason gilmore (@JasonGilmore77)
topic: general
7.14.10 • CLASSIC

Hello Beautiful, I don't know when you'll read this or be able to, but I wanted to write it because you're on my mind. At the time of this letter, you are a four-pound baby in your mother's stomach and we're so excited to meet you. You've changed my life even before arriving and I hope that never changes, even when I'm tired of your attitude or you think I'm the absolute worst because I won't let you talk to some goofy boy that you like. (More on stupid boys later.) We're praying daily that y

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to torture, or not to torture
it's not even a question that the u.s. should not engage in waterboarding
by jeffrey d. walker
topic: news
2.15.10 • CLASSIC

Waterboarding: if for any reason you just read that word and think it’s something akin to surfing, please close the web browser / book you are reading this from and never ever come back. Ok, not really. I guess you can be in on this, too. But, in case you don't really know what I'm talking about, let me take a moment to direct you to the Wikipedia entry on waterboarding. You'll note that the article mentions that "In January 2009 President Barack Obama banned the use of waterboarding." Mo

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warm oven, no bun
the many places babies come from
by maigen thomas (@Maigen)
topic: general
11.28.07 • CLASSIC

Just the other day I was reading the Dec 2005 issue of Chatelaine magazine looking for cookie recipes to make with the little girl I nanny. After marking some recipes, and making note of the cute outfits I'd like to copy, I got to the last page and the Letters to the Editor. Several were regarding a past column Special Delivery by Jay Somerset, about surrogate pregnancy. A reader wrote this Letter to the Editor regarding surrogacy: "Surrogacy commodifies babies, and all the abandonment issue

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talk nerdy to me
appreciating today's nerdy man
by alex b (@Lexistential)
topic: humor
7.16.08 • CLASSIC

Ladies and gays, listen up. That preppy-looking GQ cutie? Bo-ring. The brooding guy mentally undressing you in the biker jacket? Pass. That gym baby you kind of suspect has bigger hots for Milo Ventimiglia than he does for you? Ignore. You can do way, way better than those guys — who, incidentally, all look alike when you're beer-goggled and in the dark. Instead, think Revenge of the Nerds' Lewis or Gilbert, "Buffy"'s Xander, or even "Heroes"'s Masi Oka. Think NERD. Now, before you associat

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the power to decide
why it’s necessary for women to control their birth control
by sarah ficke (@DameMystery)
topic: news
3.7.12 • CLASSIC

When Sandra Fluke stood up to testify in front of Congress on February 23rd about the importance of accessible birth control for all women, she probably didn’t expect to be called a prostitute. Women probably didn’t think that, in March of 2012, we’d be defending our right to use a medicine that was approved for sale 52 years ago. And yet, here we are again having to convince people – primarily men – that women do have the right to have sex without pregnancy.

We live in a time when men are lowering or erasing the barriers that allow them to get women pregnant (see: insurance-subsidized Viagra), while making it harder and harder for women to prevent conception. While the issue is birth control, no-one is really talking about condoms in this case. Condoms are available on supermarket shelves, they cost less to buy, and they are known to prevent STIs – a definite medical benefit. They also require the consent of a man. The real subject of the conversation is the pill: the birth control method that women control and that women can practice with or without a man’s knowledge or consent.* The question then becomes not just should women use contraception, but should women be allowed to choose contraception on their own? There are many excellent reasons why the answer is – and should always be – yes.

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shopping around the beltway
a look at the men's side of women's sizing
by erik lars myers (@TopFermented)
topic: humor
2.16.07 • CLASSIC

There I was: At home, walking nonchalantly across my living room when tragedy struck. Contrary to what you may think, tragedy doesn't always strike with a gong, or a boom, or even an ominous flash of lightning and rumble of thunder. In this case, tragedy had more of a soft "fwip" as my belt broke in half while I was taking it off -- which meant it was time to shop for a new one. Up until that point, I'd bought 3 belts in my life. The first was some belt I bought in K-Mart, maybe Ames, pos

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constant craving
*the secret* to success
by heather m. millen
topic: humor
8.27.08 • CLASSIC

The other day I was sitting at my desk. It was about 4:00 in the afternoon, the day had been a bit stressful and I was greatly in need of a tiny token of relief. Suddenly, I realized that all my soul craved was a cookie. I don't eat cookies very often but who am I to judge what my soul desires? My husband happened to call and I said aloud and with conviction: "I really want a cookie." Ask. Cookies are good. I used to make cookies with my grandmother. She made these amazing little thumbp

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slimed by digital ectoplasm
by jeff miller (@jmillerboston)
topic: pop culture
3.14.12 • CLASSIC

Man, I've worked with some really fantastic people. People I'm proud to call friends 20 years later; folks I hope to know for many years to come. Others, despite our natural chemistry and the sharing of a thousand pizzas and coffees and cigarettes (I've since quit), I keep only in my memory, for whatever inexplicable reasons people have for maintaining distance in the face of friendship.

But then sometimes – and it's a fortunate rarity – there are people I just want to forget completely. Inevitable adversaries that've had such an ill effect on my psyche, I not only want them out of my life, I want any residual smears of negative energy they’ve left in my airspace GONE. FOREVER. The idea that they might irrevocably occupy some part of my brain is not only depressing, it’s offensive. All I want is for their memory to just...peter away, down the drain of my subconscious, and with any luck...poof! Gone.

“TOO BAD!” say Facebook, Linkedin, and Twitter.

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re: irrussistible
I am not going to read it this time. I do and I just cannot pull myself together to comment. It is a beautiful tribute. I am very glad that you wro...

re: guns don't kill people....
Can we please find a way to heal and protect? I NEWTOWN, Conn. (AP) — A man opened fire Friday inside two classrooms at the Connecticut elementary sc...

re: a year without netflix
I would expect that and especially Netflix. Marketing, baby. They're spending zillions to get new subscribers....

re: everybody poops
What a bunch of crap! :-D Sorry. I tried to let it pass. Butt I'm weak. [edited]...

re: you are on your own heroes journey
Too short. Sigh. Thanks Maigen. I just miss him. I am glad that I can find people who cared deeply for him here. He had such good friends here!...


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