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THE EMPIRE OF JEFFREY:     HOME  :  ALL COLUMNS

ALL COLUMNS BY JEFFREY D. WALKER

1 to 10 of 127 columns
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1. finding the line between young and old
read at your own risk, because once you get it, you might know you're old, too
humor - sample
9.14.12 : feature column!

It is an undeniable truth harbored by the young: getting old is not cool! “I don’t want to grow up” is more than just a slogan for “Toys ‘R’ Us”; young people tend to believe that old people are generally boring, and do boring things, and talk about boring stuff. And most any kid, even if they love their parents and grandparents, both fear and loathe the idea of becoming old themselves. Of course, kids desire all of the stuff that comes with being grown up, like having their own place, t...
2. the little red obama
obama is working, while everyone else sits on their ass
news - criticism
6.14.12 : feature column!

This article is part of Jeffrey’s Quadrennial series leading up to the election of our next President of the United States. While prior years have attempted discussion and diplomacy, this year he’s just being snarky because, even though Jeff is a Republican, he has absolutely no love for Mitt Romney’s Presidential campaign. You're invited to add your two-cents in the discussion column. I recently again read The Little Red Hen to my toddler. As those familiar with the tale may recall, The Lit...
3. open letter to mitt romney - what you need to do to win
will the old mitt romney please stand up
news - criticism
5.14.12 : feature column!

From the Desk of Jeffrey D. Walker, Esq. Inside the Offices of Intrepid Media May, 2012 Dear Gov. Romney: I am a 37 year old registered Republican living in New York State. I am also the chief political correspondant and commentator for Intrepid Media. We might not be a large outfit that you are familiar with, but don't judge us by our underexposure - judge after considering the following suggestions about your upcoming election. To sum it all up, Governor, if you want to win, you need to b...
4. he who said that 'talk is cheap' has never hired a lawyer
the day job i don’t usually talk about
humor - general
4.12.12 : feature column!

I’ve openly discussed the years I spent chasing rock stardom here in my columns at IM. Less frequently do I discuss that my day job is being an attorney, which I’ve done for almost ten years now. Why don’t I bring it up much? For one, I usually am obliged to omit most of the juicy details. Each of my clients entrusts to me certain confidences that I am ethically obliged to keep secret. I feel ok admitting items that we have filed in a Court (matter of public record at that point, after all...
5. gaining your perspective
what is intrepid to the reader?
writing - discussion
3.19.12 : feature column!

Welcome again! You've been guided through links and posts across cyberspace to arrive at this very moment here at Intrepid Media. Thank you for making that journey! On behalf of the Intrepid Media ("IM") crew, I welcome you. Pardon me for being presumptuous, but haven't I seen you here before? Surely I have. You're here because you're my friend/family who comes because I send you links to my stuff. And may your deity of choice love you and bless you for it. If that's not you, perhaps ...
6. hands off my brown bag
when politics and your kids' lunch cross paths
news - discussion
2.22.12 : feature column!

If you don't listen to extremely right-wing news sources (and I'm not talking Fox News here, I'm talking Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck), then you probably missed the story about a Turkey and Cheese sandwich that was rejected by a school food inspector, who ordered instead that the four-year old eat school cafeteria chicken nuggets. Then, it allegedly happened again. Of course, such stories would come out of my home state of North Carolina, where I was raised to be a good Republican boy, and wher...
7. facing a bump
vouchers offered by continental airlines are the real deal
general - business
1.18.12 : feature column!

It’s one of those things that you fear when traveling by airplane. You’re headed through the terminal to your gate, and you’re looking at the screens. Departures… departures… check flight number… On time is what it said when we got to Cleveland on December 28th, headed back from Christmas with my in-laws, me, my wife, and our 8 month old. And then... ”Ladies and Gentlemen waiting for service to Ithaca…” The plane we were supposed to fly on was… I don’t know exactly. Not available; crashe...
8. from such great heights, come down
the fall into reality continues
pop culture - lifestyle
12.14.11 : feature column!

This is going to sound like complaining. But, it also could be the documenting of my mental collapse. So, enjoy. In August, I wrote a piece called If you’re an artist, when is enough enough? Therein, I lamented about my urge to continue to make music, when I most certainly was not doing so. And now, four more months have passed; or, 1/3 of a year. And I am equally nowhere in terms of music creation. What has happened? The easy answer is: it's hard to keep producing music without a band. ...
9. re-starting real
what a decade plus of reality television has taught me about reality
pop culture - lifestyle
11.9.11 : feature column!

I heard this story this weekend on NPR about the “Golden Age” of MTV, in which it was claimed that MTV aired "the first reality show" on television in the early 1990s. That show was The Real World, and the "reality" was that the people were all real people, and not actors; that the show depicted these real people interacting in "real" situations; and the hook, as the introductory credits touted, was that the show demonstrated what happens "... when people stop being polite, and start getting r...
10. cleaning a dirty mouth
quitting cursing cold turkey
humor - lifestyle
10.10.11 : feature column!

This article is about foul language and is not appropriate for children. For as long as I’ve been old enough to use curse words, I have. Living in New York City from 2002-2005 did little to curb this behavior. I also had one work situation that featured cursing on an often and loud basis. Overall, since my mid-twenties especially, I’ve had little need, desire, nor encouragement to curb my foul-mouthed behavior. Fact: I have been known to shout offensive words in public places just to cau...
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RAVES

re: the little red obama

I'm glad someone's paying attention. Obama's biggest problem, I think, is PR.

re: how doing it can help the economy

Even though I'm ambivalent about it.

re: the cylon election?

The column I would have written on the subject. Great capture of the current national mindset... plus Cylons!

re: picking a spouse

absolute truth, and you would know. Thanks for this column!

re: picking a spouse

Brilliant observations, and proof that you have considerable common sense as well (particularly in your choice of wife)

re: no mosque, no mosque

Although I disagree with you, you make the kind of common sense argument I would have made on the other side. If political debate were more like this, we'd be in a lot better shape right now.

re: no mosque, no mosque

I would feel much more charitable towards the G.O.P. if they realized the absurd extent of their hypocrisy.

re: no mosque, no mosque

A little sanity. Thanks.

re: the men who stare at boobs

This. Is. Brilliant.

re: the men who stare at boobs

Funny and provocative. Title is once in a lifetime. Nice work, Jeff.

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